Spicing Things Up
by JeanieMD
Summary: Once again, out of season - but I didn't want to wait eleven months. I hope you think it's amusing!
For the third time on the drive home from work a passing vehicle sent dirty grey slush across the truck's windshield. "I will be so happy when winter is over," Sam muttered as he fiddled with the windshield wiper button. "The last couple of weeks have been so miserable – nobody should have to experience the month of March in Toronto. It's still freezing, and everything is ugly and germy – if I catch the cold that Epstein set loose at the station I'll kill him – and it seems farther away from spring than ever."

"I know what you mean," Andy responded in a weary tone. "I can't remember when we last saw the sun, or the last time I actually felt warm."

"Really?" Sam asked, raising an eyebrow. "I seem to remember you felt pretty hot this morning before we got up for work."

"Yes, fine – felt warm out of bed, I mean," Andy snorted. "Do you want something to eat when we get home?"

"No, I'm good," Sam replied. "Diaz brought in several dozen muffins and too many of them ended up in our office. That guy can bake."

"One of his many talents," Andy agreed. "It's because he follows the directions in the recipe to the letter. No improvising for Chris."

"Here we are," Sam sighed. "Let's get inside as quick as we can."

"Good idea," Andy said as she climbed out of the truck. "Oh, by the way, I have a treat for you inside."

"A treat? What kind of treat?" asked Sam as he unlocked the door.

"Well, I don't want you to feel insulted or anything, but I've been thinking that our love life has become a bit predictable lately. Perfectly fine, but just not as exciting as it could be – so on my lunch break today I stopped in at one of those love shops and picked up a few things that might add some spice." Andy looked at Sam to see his reaction, and wasn't too surprised to see a mixture of indignation and curiosity.

"What kind of 'things'?" he asked, heading into the living room.

"Well, I was already getting pretty turned on while I was choosing them," Andy giggled. "I hope they have the same effect on you. Why don't you grab a beer and make yourself comfortable, and I'll get myself ready."

"Don't take too long," Sam growled. "I'm a little bit insulted so I'm counting on the big reveal to improve my mood."

"I'll be right back," Andy promised as she headed to their bedroom.

Sam was enjoying his beer, lying back on the couch with his feet on the coffee table when Andy reappeared. He had just taken a mouthful and his reflex reaction was an immediate spit-take. His face wore an expression of horror as he looked at Andy all dressed up in her new 'things'.

She stood in front of him in skin-tight black leather pants, a matching bustier, and 4" stilettos. She was carrying a whip in one hand and a dog collar and leash in the other. Her face was impassive as she waited for Sam to regain his composure.

Sam seemed unable to speak. His eyebrows were raised high above his disbelieving eyes, his expression a grimace unlike anything she had ever seen. He sputtered a little as he tried frantically to find something to say to this apparition in front of him.

"Well?" Andy demanded aggressively. "What do you think? How do you feel about putting on the collar?"

"Andy," Sam began desperately, "what - I mean why - are you really..."

Andy couldn't keep it up any longer. Her haughty disdain was replaced by absolute glee as she watched her husband struggle to express himself.

"Nothing to say? That doesn't happen very often. I'm going to make a note of that on the calendar. What's the date today? March 31st? Oh no, it's after midnight so it's..."

"April 1st!" Sam blurted out, trying to pull himself together. "April Fool's Day. Andy, so help me..."

He stood up and walked towards her. "You really got me," he said, the relief in his voice very evident. "My God, Andy, my mind was filled with terrible pictures of me on all fours with you holding the leash! This has to be the most successful April Fool's prank that anyone has ever pulled on me. Can you return that gear to the shop and get your money back?"

"Actually it's from a costume rental place, and it was worth the few dollars it cost just to see your reaction."

"I can imagine what that looked like," Sam chuckled. "Must have been a riot."

"See for yourself," Andy said as she kicked off her heels and went to the table to pick up the laptop that had been sitting there, preset to record everything. She brought it back to Sam, turning it so they could both see, hit "play", and waited for his reaction as the entire scene flashed across the screen.

Sam laughed until the tears came as he saw himself stunned by the sight of the dominatrix before him. Andy was laughing too, delighted that she had succeeded in pulling the whole thing off. When the scene ended she put the laptop down and turned towards him, enjoying the look on his face as he shook his head.

"I'm just gonna go take this get-up off and put everything back in the bag so I can return it," she said, but Sam reached out to run his fingers over the curve of her black-leather-covered hip.

"Do you have to take it off right away?" he asked, dabbling the fingers of his other hand in the plunging neckline of the bustier. "I mean, I'm relieved that you don't really think our sex life is boring, but there's nothing wrong with a little _extra_ spice, is there? But by all means do put down your –ah – accessories," he continued. "This is a great look for you, even better than the "way cheap" outfit you wore to The Mermaid Lounge."

Andy gave him a sultry look as she put down her whip and the collar and leash. "Just don't damage the leather," she said, "or I'll have to buy it outright."

"And that would be a bad thing?" Sam leered, hooking his finger in the laces of the bustier and pulling her close. "I'm just thankful that nobody else will ever see that video," he continued, putting his arms around her and leaning in to kiss her.

"Are you sure nobody else will see it?" Andy murmured in his ear. "It could go viral."

"I don't think so, Mistress McNally," was the response as Sam's lips came down on hers.


End file.
